I feel like starting a concert review blog post thing is a really good idea. So I’m doing it. So suck it.
Just to give you guys perspective on where I was at physically and mentally, I got out of my cab and retreated to hit up the local Rite Aid. I bought some Zantac and Immodium AD and a bottle of Poland Springs (the best bottled water this side of Fiji). I popped one of each because my stomach was feeling not the best stuff ever.
I had planned on going to this show with a couple of friends but, like always, they had plans. ‘Tis the bullshittery that comes along with working in the food industry. So ya- I went to the show alone. Fuck you if you think that’s weird. Also – and just for context – before the summer, I looked up all the Tuesday and Wednesday shows I could/wanted to go to because those are the only days I can really get off during the week. Best Coast definitely fit that bill after only a couple minutes of YouTube searching.
I got to the show wicked late- billing said the whole shebang started at 8 and I got there, with my shitter clogged and my tummy acid assuaged, at around 9:45. I was happy I did because BC didn’t go on until closer to 10. The crowd was super mixed- old, young, couples, and me. Is there a fucking rule that if you go to a show with your girlfriend that you must dance in a prom position the whole night? The people that stood in front of me were great for people watching. In front of me I had a girl that looked like her name was Maggie- take that for what it’s worth, a couple where the man was 6 inches shorter than his woman, who wore mid waisted jeans and did a non-ironic Carlton the whole night, and girl under 5 ft. who lost all control and was dancing so furiously that the maintenance crew had to refloor the place after the show.
The show was at the Theater of Living Arts, my favorite venue so far in Philly. It’s small and old looking and the tickets are always cheap. Never seen a bad show there. To be honest the tickets were actually free due to an acquaintance of mine who is/was blowing a dude who works there. That’s not entirely true but it’s close enough where I feel confident writing it.
Since I was alone and my stomach was sour and I was fighting poop, I obviously got a 16 oz. Miller Lite. It tasted great like it always does and I nestled into a decently unimpeded view of the stage. After a rousing rendition of “I Need You Baby” half from the DJ and half from the crowd, the band took the stage and immediately got down to business.
Aside- I smoked my fair share of pot my freshman year. Never really took a shine to it even though I gave it the ol’ college try. That being said, the sweet smell of weed smoke in the air at a concert really cements the atmosphere. You smell the sticky icky and you know where you’re at.
Now due to my YouTube-ing and Googling, I knew that Bethany Cosentino was no eye sore. What I didn’t know was that she is fucking absolutely unbelievably marry-able. Oh gosh did I fall in love all at once. It was the, she had sexy tattoos and mentioned her undies riding up, kind of LOVE. For the rest of the band, Bobb Bruno, the other main staple of the group, nailed lead. They had a handsome hipster rhythm guitarist/bassist/whatever else he decided to play who I took a shining to, as well. However, there happened to be a guy who looked like a rapist on drums. That actually pissed me off because most vids I saw featured Ali Koehler, from Vivian Girls, on the beat makers. The sexual predator did good tho. Whatever.
The music was great. Really it was. Most of the songs beg the question if livin’ on the West Coast, would really be the Best Coast…. I surmise it may be. If I worked for Spin or Trolling Stone magazine, I might complain that the songs all sounded similar but I don’t get paid to write. I just do it for the chicks. And I actually liked the similarity in the sound because that’s why I went to the show. I wanted a girl singing Cali rock and that’s what I got. Also the songs were short and usually hookless. I really liked that since I’m not a longtime fan of the band. I hate the shows where every dickhead is singing along with a part I feel like I should know. Even though I was unfamiliar with the music, there were lines I was especially was in tune with- “if I sleep on the floor- will it make you love me more?” was especially nice. The songs were mostly upbeat but when it came time to get sexy, Cosentino didn’t disappoint. I mean, I’m in love. I’m clearly compromised in this part of the review. The crowd’s favorite was definitely:
I know that Bethany might not like the comparison (we’re friends and she goes by Beth…) but she was like a super West Cost, surfery version of Zooey Deschanel in the way that she commanded the mic and the vocals were just all her all night. No back ups no nothing. And she had the perfect kind of live voice for me. On a scale of 1 – Freddie Mercury, she wasn’t Fred but she didn’t miss a beat. She played her voice into her wheelhouse and delivered the same sound that you hear on the CD. I daresay she’s got the best ooh’s and ahh’s in the biz.
She drank beer, which got me wet because I was drinking beer too. 6 pints during the performance – to her one. I was thirsty. They interacted with the crowd nicely saying they watched Snakes on a Plane and Soul Plane that day..they deemed Soul Plane the superior but really, they’re both A+ stuff. Also she bragged that one song was on a JC Penny commercial, which made me laugh for some reason. I was smitten, alright?
I couldn’t decided how to grade shows but this is how I’m gonna do it for now.
1.) Wouldn’t go again
2.) Might go again
3.) Would go again
This is a Would Absolutely Go Again!
Someone tell that singer that I would go down on her, up on her, and side to side on her.